Tolerance and a Short Message about Stars

today i was able to experience a very unique and wonderful event--TEDx Youth.  This was an independently operated TED event organized and led by some girls from another all-girls school on the Upper East Side.  i only was able to stay for a portion of this event but i have two things i want to share from it at this time.

the first thing i want to touch on is the message of tolerance.  i must say that in my "mean girl" demeanor i often am less than "tolerant".  it might be the tourist who stops to take the picture in the middle of the sidewalk, or the annoying person in the subway.  it might be the guy who has asked me for money in 10 different spots across the city saying he needs money to "get home".  i like to think i'm tolerant.  that im accepting of many types of people, but the reality is, i think it is easy to be tolerant of people who are similar to me, but when it comes to people who are different, that is where i tend to be intolerant.  

this incredibly amazing guy named marc elliot gave a TEDx talk today and sold the following message: 

live and let live.

well, who is he to say this?

marc has lived with turrets for 20 years.  he shared some stories from his life that were appalling, heartbreaking, humorous.  i wanted to feel sorry for him, but instead, he told us there was nothing to be "sorry" for.  in fact, it was quite the opposite.  marc's disease has given him the ability to live a life of tolerance i have never seen before.  

live and let live.

don't give a funny stare.  don't laugh under your breath.  don't talk behind their back.  

the truth is, i don't know the struggles people are facing in their life.  i don't know where they come from, what they have been through, what their life has been like.  and dear god am i sometimes in need of this sort of tolerance.  sometimes our struggles are private.  sometimes our struggles are public.  but every struggle we go through affects the way we deal with others.

live and let live. 

i need to work on this.  i want to work on this.

here is marc's video.  i highly recommend you watch some of his stuff.  it changed me, that is without a doubt.

one last word on marc.  he doesn't tic anymore.  one of the girls from my school asked him how it is he doesn't tic anymore.  and he said that he took some classes on guess what...JOY.  funny.  i JUST blogged about that.  joy has enabled him to stop his tics.  i think i need to spend even more time contemplating joy.    if it did such amazing things for marc, what could it possibly do for me?  

and then, there is a little business about stars.  there was this amazingly talented 19 year old named ajay johnson who shared an incredible story and some even more incredible poetry during her TEDx talk.  in one of her poems she shared, there was a line i had to borrow a pen to write down.  it was this: 

i learned a lot about stars that year

i learned not to invest in things you know will fall

even if they eventually fall where you want them to.

mr. universe sure had a message for me this morning.

this week has been a struggle emotionally for me.  i can't really get into it for many reasons but the first and foremost being the privacy of all involved.  but i found it interesting that i shared this experience with someone whom perhaps this part spoke to me about.  and i reach an awkward part of this blog because i know this person will read my blog.  thats when having this whole "online diary" thing becomes a bit "strange"...do you share without restriction or do you just lay it all out there.  i've never really held back before though, and I'm not going to now.

its funny how the stars crashed together...live and let live, but don't invest in things you know will fall.  

so i both speak to this person and to the other 75ish people who read this blog on a regular basis (by the way...THANK YOU...i can't tell you how awesome it is to know that so many of you read).

i haven't got a clue where you have been in your life.  i can't pretend to know your life story or the things that make you tic.  wouldn't it be cool if we each had 30 minutes to tell each other our "life stories".  the disappointments and joys that we have faced.  i think we would both be surprised what we would learn about the other.  and i wonder about the assumptions you might make about me.  and i wonder about the assumptions i make about you. 

but then, there are the stars...and what i learned from them today.  don't invest in things you know will fall.  live and let live.  

i heard what you said.

and i respect it because i can't pretend to know where you have been or what makes you tic.

but

i want to.

for some inexplicable, irrational reason

i do.

and though i completely expect for this not to happen.

i still do.

and this tiny voice inside me says that at the very least it is nice to know you are wanted, and there can never be a loss at giving that information even when it isn't returned, for whatever reason.

though i fear i have said too much...a life without risk is no life at all.

live and let live. let the stars fall where they may. but i am going to try to stop chasing that star, and watch where it falls.  

colie.